The Networker

No Elephants Were Harmed in the Making of this Essay

No Elephants Were Harmed in the Making of this Essay

There’s a big box in my guest room containing one redneck coloring book (never used), four pink flamingos (brand-new), one wrench beer opener (still in the package) and an assortment of other equally useful items. I keep the box there partly because my guest room has...

Waiting Tables Teaches Life Lessons

Waiting Tables Teaches Life Lessons

When I was a teenager, I was a server in a small-town restaurant where every table had a deck of cards for the coffee crowd, and the pancakes covered entire plates. It was a good job for a teenager, except for the fact that people got hungry so darn early in the...

My New British Boyfriend

My New British Boyfriend

He said, “How can I help?” and I fell in love. It was the accent that did it. Plus, I was at a vulnerable point in my life—or at least, in my day. I’d been confused, lost in iPhone settings, punching option after option when I saw one that said, “British male.” I’m...

Finally a Barbie that Looks Like Me

Finally a Barbie that Looks Like Me

Barbie dolls have been inspiring young girls for generations but I never had one. My dolls could never live up to Barbie’s perfect good looks, her globetrotting and her amazing career success. It’s really no wonder they made a movie about her. She’s had 250 careers,...

Smartphone; Dumb Deeds

Smartphone; Dumb Deeds

You see that woman digging through her purse like a starving dog digging for a bone? I’ll bet you anything she’s in the throes of that particular kind of anxiety attack one has when one realizes her smartphone has gone missing. I’m very responsible with my phone, so I’ve never experienced it myself. But I know the symptoms when I see them….

Breathe… Breathe… Swear!

Breathe… Breathe… Swear!

I go into my bedroom and close the door. I meditate almost daily in my effort to become a wiser, calmer and gentler person and the closed door is a signal to my family.

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